Wednesday, May 15, 2013

Pretty Woman and the Defense of Oral Sex

Pretty Woman and the Defense of Oral Sex

It seems everybody is writing a sex article these days so I figure why not me.  Here goes.  I was channel surfing the other day and I came across one of my favorite movies, “Pretty Woman”.  I had not seen the movie in a long time and I happen to catch it when it first came on so I figured why not. 

Its funny how you can view something you have seen many times before and then you see it in a new and different way.  In particular a specific scene in the movie really caught my attention because it was like I was viewing it for the first time.  I’m talking about the scene towards the beginning of the film where Vivian has agreed to stay the night with Richard for $300.  Before the night ends the film scene heavily implies that Vivian gives Richard oral sex.

Now, in my opinion the porn industry and our society have ruined the female offering of oral sex.  I think women believe that men’s desire for sexual pleasure from receiving oral sex comes from a dark place of watching pornography that subjugates women and just involves getting-in and getting-off.  But in watching this scene I was struck by what I considered to be the beauty of the scene and I thought this was the perfect defense of this male desire.

For those that might not have seen the movie or are not sure what I am talking about, allow me to describe the scene.  The male character, Richard, is a wealthy business man in Beverly Hills for the week on business.  He has just broken up with his girlfriend and is in a little bit of a funk.  He is driving back to his hotel after a party and has become lost.  The female character, Vivian, is a prostitute living and working in Hollywood.  She is working the street this night when Richard shows up in his car looking for directions to Beverly Hills.  Vivian gets into Richards car and shows him personally how to get to his destination.  Long story short, Richard is intrigued by Vivian’s infectious personality and pays her to come to his room for the night. 

Once in the room Vivian tries to move things along towards sex but Richard resists only wanting to talk.  To slow things down Richard offers to pay Vivian for the entire night instead of just an hour to which Vivian agrees. 

Now that the pressure of having sex for money has been removed, Vivian relaxes with some strawberries and champagne on the floor and is watching “I Love Lucy”.  Richard sits down in the chair in the living room close to Vivian.  Now we get to the good part.  After a couple casual words bantered back and forth between Richard and Vivian, Vivian pauses and reflects for a couple of moments.  She looks into Richards eyes and slowly begins to crawl across the floor towards him.  It’s almost as though Vivian has realized that Richard is not her usual clientele.  He is a nice guy who is lonely and was looking for some type of a connection with another person.  In this moment Vivian decides that she wants to provide an offering to Richard. 

Once she has made her way to Richard she positions herself on her knees between his legs.  While still keeping eye contact, she strokes his leg and slowly removes her outer clothing.  Then a moment of comic relief as Vivian gets off her knees to get a pillow to put on the floor in order to have a comfortable place while she is on her knees.  Vivian mutes the television, pulls Richard into a more relaxed seated position then proceeds to unzip his pants and unbutton his shirt.  She then looks him in the eye and asks, “What do you want?” 

This is of course a rhetorical question; Vivian has already decided that she wants to give Richard this offering of oral sex.  Vivian kisses her way down his chest before pausing one last time to look at the television and smile at the program.  Richard takes a deep breath in as the scene then fades away. 

What strikes me about the scene is the idea of one person making an offering of pleasure to another person.  Vivian clearly did not have to make this offer to Richard.  Richard appeared to be perfectly content just to have her company for the night.  When Vivian realized that she was safe with Richard and that Richard was a nice guy she was overcome by a feeling that she wanted to make an offering to Richard.  This was an offering to show him that she appreciated him.

For men, receiving oral sex from your partner is highly pleasurable on a physical level.  I don’t think most women realize however how pleasurable it can be on a spiritual level though.  For men I think we tend make stronger emotional connections from being touched.  There is no more intimate way of a man being touched than receiving oral sex.  Also what this scene communicates to me is that when one person wants to demonstrate a feeling of appreciation and gratitude to another there is no better way to convey this than through some type of offering. 

I believe that men and women respond to different types of offerings from partners or loved ones.  The offering of oral sex that I have just described here is a beautiful scene to me.   What makes it a beautiful scene is that it demonstrates that oral sex does not have to be a dirty thing; instead it can be a spiritual offering of beauty and love.  I think that is the best spiritual defense for oral sex. 

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